MerMark: How It All Began
by Stelena-Beautiful
Summary: A very short, very AU look at Meredith and Mark's lives as they are complicated by an unexpected addition to their world: a daughter named Carolyn.
1. Chapter 1

**MerMark: How It All Started**

_**A/N:**__ This is just a very small __snippet__ of a very __large __project I am working on about Meredith and Mark having a daughter together named Carolyn who is following in her mom's footsteps and unwittingly, in her father's too. This short work introduces the AU world of MerMark and their daughter to readers. There can never be enough MerMark fics in my not-so-humble opinion. Thanks for reading!_

**Part 1**

She watched her daughter step onto the stage at her own almamater and accept her diploma as she clapped wildly. She glanced at a chubby blonde next to her in a matching metal-gray folding chair and said, voice hoarse with pride, "That's my daughter. That's my baby girl!" The woman just rolled her eyes at Meredith and turned away.

Meredith kept clapping undeterred by the chubby blonde's lack of enthusiasm. This was an amazing day. An epic day really. Her little girl was graduating from medical school. In just two months she would be interning at Meredith's own hospital. It was all Meredith could do not to squeal louder. They had come so far. So, so very far.

This very university campus was a major part of their lives too. Meredith had raised Carolyn single-handedly in an apartment nearby while jugging medical school herself and she had somehow passed her love of medicine down to her only child. All the struggles they had been through had all been worth it because it brought them to this moment. Life wasn't perfect but it was pretty well, almost-fabulous right now. Meredith couldn't be prouder of Carolyn or the fact that she herself was in her mid-forties and still without a single gray hair to show for it. But that was an entirely different matter. Today all that mattered was that Carolyn Grey had arrived, skipped making all the mistakes Meredith herself made on the way to this moment, and turned out pretty damned amazing if Meredith did say so herself.

XoXoXo

Meredith was still snap-snap-snapping away pictures of Carolyn as she chatted and hugged her friends long after the graduation ceremony had concluded. Finally Carolyn looked up at Meredith with matching hazel eyes and sighed. "Aren't you out of film yet?" she asked.

"Nope. I have two more rolls in my trusty fanny pack," Meredith asked and smiled at her daughter.

Carolyn moved over to Meredith and wrapped her slender arm around Meredith's even skinnier one. "I think you took more pictures than any other parent here."

"I was the proudest parent here," Meredith said, going to snap another picture of Carolyn but she grabbed the camera away from her mother.

"Seriously, Mom? This is embarrassing."

Meredith grinned. "Okay, okay, I'll stop. _For now_. At least until we get to dinner at Yo's. Then it's on."

Carolyn shook her head but was smiling. "I know I can't stop you."

"Nope. I'm just so damn proud of you. You graduated with honors, you're going to be a kick-ass surgeon someday ..."

"Uh, pediatrician, Mom."

Meredith grinned. "Okay we're going to have to talk about that for sure..."

XoXoXo

_Much later that night ..._

After a good meal at their favorite restaurant, Meredith and Carolyn returned to their house. Carolyn ended up passing out on the living room sofa after drinking two celebratory glasses of champagne (she was a lightweight in that way, which Meredith was oddly fine with) and Meredith covered her with a blanket and started for her own room. She stopped halfway down the hall though and trotted back to the living room to see Carolyn one more time, almost as if to memorize her daughter somehow.

As she watched her, she thought over once again all she and Carolyn had been to each other, all they had been through to come to this point where they were successful and fairly happy. It hadn't always been so easy. Not even close but the truth was, Meredith wouldn't change any of it for the world at this moment.

XoXoXo

_**Martha's Vineyard**_

_**Almost 26 years ago**_

_She hadn't wanted to come on this vacation. If you could even call it vacation. Ellis sequestered herself all day inside the hotel's conference room and when she came back to the room at night, she turned the lights out by eight-fifteen p.m. and was snoring by eight-twenty. They didn't even really speak to each other, not that that was surprising, but Meredith would have welcomed even a conversation with her mother if it meant she could be less bored. _

_But after three nights there, Meredith knew nothing would change and finally dug out her old fake ID from her high school rebellious days and hurried to the nearest bar, flashed it and despite being questioned if she was really in fact twenty-one because didn't look it (of course not, she was just barely eighteen!), was served a dry martini. _

_She was working on her second martini when she felt rather than saw a heated gaze sweep over her. Involuntarily, it made her shudder and she followed the line of the person's stare. A fantastic-looking man in his early twenties or so was lounging at a table surrounded by a group of scantily clad blonde women. They were all jocking for his attention but to Meredith's surprise, his gaze was on her alone. When they locked eyes, he lifted his glass of vodka to her and she blushed and turned away. She was very instantly attracted to him but she wasn't the kind of girl to make the first move, never had been, and was sure she never would be. Plus, she wasn't sure what a guy who looked like that could want with a skinny, mousy teenager like her. _

_Still, she felt his penetrating gaze locked on hers and was considering ordering another martini when he finally moved over to her. He flashed her a perfect set of pearly whites before sliding into the stool next to hers. He addressed the bartender first. "Get her another martini. I'll have one too," he said. He then swiveled on his stool to face her._

_"I never have had to approach a woman before you know," he said._

_She feigned studying her watch in boredom though her heart was hammering in her chest. "Oh?" she finally said. "I suppose you are used to them coming running just when you flick your fingers."_

_She felt the heat of his smile even though she wasn't directly looking at him. "Exactly," he said._

_"Well I'm sorry to disappoint you."_

_"You don't sound sorry," he said. "Not at all. So tell me ..."_

_"What?"_

__

"What will it take a guy like me to impress a girl like you?"

_Meredith smiled widely in spite of herself. "Charm and tact would be nice for starters," she said. "Something I can see you were not born with. A little less arrogance too would be an added bonus..."_

_He grinned. "Hey at least I didn't come over here with some cheesy pickup line."_

_"I would have probably preferred it."_

_"Okay let me think of some," he said with a laugh, titling his head to the side thoughtfully. "'Baby you must be a broom cause you have swept me off my feet... Or how about this one? Are you religious cause you are the answers to my prayers ...'"_

_Meredith laughed loudly. "Those are terrible."_

_"I know," the guy admitted. "So aren't you glad I didn't try to sell you with one of those? I've at least got a good imagination."_

_"And an ego that apparently knows no bounds."_

_He grinned. "No. I'm just confidant."_

_"Confidant that you can get me into bed?"_

_"Are you asking me to take you to bed?"_

_Meredith alternately smiled and blushed. "No, not even."_

"Oh you are going to play hard to get huh?"

_Meredith shrugged and stood up. "I am not playing. That's more your territory I think." She started for the door and smiled as he called after her._

_"You'll be back. I know you will."_

_"In your dreams," she said._

_But the very next night, she did indeed return to the bar and by the end of the evening, they were in each other's arms. _


	2. Chapter 2

_**New update. This part is rated "M". Thanks to all who have read and reviewed it so far.**_

**Part 2**

_"You came back," he said as soon as he spotted her walk into the door of the little bar. "I knew you would return."_

_"Don't read too much into it," Meredith said as she slid into a seat two bar stools down from his._

_He grinned. "So this is just a coincidence?"_

_"No."_

_He lifted an eyebrow and smirked. "So you admit you came back to see me?"_

_"I am not going to admit that because it's not true."_

_He rested his elbows on the bar's counter. "Oh no?"_

_"No. I came back because this was the only place in town that accepts my ID."_

_The man looked taken aback and then smirked a bit. "Please don't tell me I'm talking to an underage girl."_

_"Would it matter if you were?"_

_"Yeah, of course ... How old are you anyway?"_

_"Old enough to know better than to be pulled in by your cheesy pickup lines."_

_"Hey you wanted to hear those lines last night."_

_Meredith shook her head and turned to face the bartender. "A beer please," she said._

_The man kept watching her. "I thought you liked martinis."_

_"I like to switch it up sometimes, if you must know."_

_"So do I," he said. "Now tell me, really, how old are you?"_

_"What difference does it make?"_

_"It makes a lot to difference to me. I don't sleep with teenage girls."_

_"Not even eighteen year olds?"_

_"You're eighteen?" He said and his eyes sparkled anew._

_"Yeah but like I said, old enough to know better than to be taken in by you," Meredith said and smiled widely at the bartender as he set her beer in front of her. She took a long swig of it, ignoring the slight burning sensation, and turned in the opposite direction, feigning finding the smudged wall decor fascinating._

_She felt him behind her a moment later, his warm breath on her bare left shoulder. "You can't honestly tell me you find that wall more intriguing than talking to me."_

_She smiled. "What if I do?"_

_"I'd say you were a grade-A liar."_

_She still didn't turn to face him but said, "And I suppose you always tell the complete truth."_

_"Always."_

_"Uh huh," she said. "So if I asked you how many girls you have robbed of their innocence you would tell me." This time she turned and faced him, her leg brushing his own jean-clad one._

_If she expected him to clam up at that question, she would have been surprised. "I have been with a few women its true but none were as innocent as they wanted me to think they were. I am pretty sure you're no girl scout ..."_

_Meredith smiled. "What makes you say that?"_

_"Because I can see you want me as much as I want you," he said._

_"I don't even know your name."_

_"Its Mark and I don't know your name either."_

_"Maybe I don't want you to know."_

_"Okay fair enough but I won't know what name to scream when I'm coming on top of you."_

_Meredith blushed at that but managed to say, "Oh god. You are so full of yourself. Way too full of yourself."_

_"I'm just confidant."_

_"Right ..."_

_Mark leaned over and brushed his lips against the base of her chin. "You're not the least bit turned on?"_

_Meredith stiffened as she felt warmth spread throughout her body at the graze of his warm lips. She shook her head then. "No. Not at all."_

_Mark grinned. "Well I'm turned on enough for the both of us."_

_Meredith smiled. "Then you'll have a great time working out your sexual high by yourself."_

_Mark smiled. "Is that how you really feel?"_

_Meredith looked him in the eye. "Yep." Then she turned and downed her beer before throwing five dollars on the bar and walking out._

_She smiled as she walked through the door and out into the cool night air. She started for her car and then paused halfway there. She turned to see Mark emerging from the bar alone, jangling his car keys in his hand. He immediately spotted her._

"Were you waiting for me?" He asked with a wide smile.

_"Nope," she said. "I was just uh ... Looking for my rental car."_

_He pointed two feet away to a black Jaguar in the parking lot. "Forget looking for yours. You can try mine out."_

_Meredith didn't know exactly what it was that made her do it - pure animal attraction possibly - but she nodded and moved over to him. "Okay," she said. She extracted his car keys from his big palm. "But I'm driving."_

_XoXoXo_

_Mark watched her anxiously as she drove down the quiet streets of Martha's Vineyard, occasionally instructing her not to drive into a tree._

_They drove to a deserted beach and Meredith tossed him the keys to his Jaguar. They climbed out and moved down the beach together. They talked a bit before Mark finally grabbed Meredith and pushed her up against a little tree. _

_She held her breath for a long moment as he leaned into her oh-so-sexily before finally capturing her lips in a heated kiss. Her expertly nudged her lips apart and sluiced his tongue inside her mouth as her hands almost of their own violation wound their way up to his thick hair, snagging her fingers in the tight curls. They kissed for a long time before he slowly inched his hand down her thin torso and started undoing the buttons on her shirt. He leaned into her and whispered, "Are you sure?"_

_"Yes," she said though her voice came out sounding hoarse. _

_"Is this your first time?"_

_Meredith nodded her head. "Yeah."_

_"Don't be scared, okay?"_

_She nodded. She wasn't scared, oddly enough. She had fooled around with a few guys in high school but never actually was fully penetrated and she had heard such horror stories about a girl's first experience with intercourse. But she wasn't terrified. In fact, she wanted this a lot. Like a lot, __a lot._

_His hand pried loose the last button holding her sleeveless blouse closed and he smiled as his eyes came to rest on the swell of her naked, braless small breasts. He pulled her shirt back off her shoulders and discarded it in the sand before reaching for her left breast and slowly rubbing his thumb around the purpling nipple. She gasped at the intense pleasure his touch brought and leaned into him a bit. He massaged the breast and then reached for her right one, repeating the ministrations before carefully pulling away and shrugging off his leather jacket. He spread it out on the sand and then lowered her onto it so she was lying on her back on it and could feel the sand just under her fingertips. _

_He then slowly lowered himself to the ground and knelt over her, lifting her left breast again and bringing it to his mouth where he sucked on the bud and nibbled it gently until it pebbled in his mouth and then he repeated the task on the other breast._

_He helped her out of her short denim skirt and kissed his way up from the base of her thigh to the inner side of it. His lips buried in her soft, already moist curls and she sucked in a breath until he commanded her to release it. He then pried open the tight lips with two fingers and inserted them. She bucked wildly on the jacket and felt herself cumming even more. He then added his tongue to the mix and lapped up her juices slowly and methodically._

_"Ma - Mark," she choked out between a bone-shattering orgasm. "Just ..."_

_"Be patient," he said and then ducked his head back between her thighs, finding her clit and licking it gently. _

_Finally when she could the torture no more, she forcefully grabbed him by the hair and yanked him up to face her. "Come on. Just do it. Please," she pleaded._

_He smiled and brushed her lips one more time before nodding and beginning to undo his jeans. He doffed his jeans and briefs and then poised himself over her entrance. "Are you ready?"_

_She nodded. "Yes."_

_He slowly lowered himself on top of her, gradually poking his dick into her moist folds and then pausing until she nodded and urged him on. _

_Pain seared her for a moment and tears watered her face but he lightly brushed them away and she urged him forward. He settled the rest of the way inside of her and slowly thrust into her before she began to match him for each thrust and said, "Go faster. Really."_

_He sped up a bit and she began to really get into it, the friction and heat their bodies were generating was amazing. He was surprisingly gentle but also very thorough and passionate and Meredith loved every moment of it. He watched her intently until he noticed her eyes begging for release and then he nodded and slowly pulled out._

_He rested his head on her neck and asked her, "How was it?"_

_"I would tell you but I don't want your head to swell ... more," she joked and kissed him. Before long they were having sex again. _

_When they had finished their second round he asked, "Don't you think it's about time you tell me your name now."_

_"Yeah, its Meredith."_

XoXoXo

They spent every night of the rest of that week together on that beach and then on Meredith's last night in Martha's Vineyard, they agreed to meet once more and exchange phone numbers and addresses but he never showed up though she waited at their beach all night almost.

Four weeks later, she was back home and she found out she was pregnant. Life would never be the same.


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

The hardest part for Meredith about being pregnant back then was knowing she was going to have to tell Ellis. She knew her mother was going to freak out when she learned the truth.

Of course Meredith had considered terminating the pregnancy - she had always been Pro-Choice - but in the end, she couldn't. The thought of having someone love her and having someone to love for the first time really in her life made that decision impossible even if it would derail her college and medical school plans for a bit. But only for a bit because she was determined she would make it as a surgeon someday and make her child proud.

The night she told Ellis, she threw up three times - twice before in anxiety and once after just born of plain old revulsion at the way her mother had treated her.

_She walked into the study to find Ellis reading over a medical textbook. What else was new, really? Ellis looked up only when Meredith coughed a few times pointedly._

_"Are you sick, Meredith?" Ellis asked, lowering her reading glasses to peer at her daughter._

_"No. I just was trying to get your attention ..."_

"There are other ways to do that," Ellis said. "Try being more dignified about it next time."

"Okay, Mother. Will do," Meredith said and shifted from foot to foot in nervousness.

_"Well what do you want to talk about?"_

_"Uh, I don't really know how to say this ... I could just spit it out but I feel like I should prepare you somehow and yet, I don't know how to do that either so -"_

_"Meredith!"_

_"Yes?"_

_"Stop rambling and say what you need to say for gods 'sake. You know I appreciate when a person is up front with me."_

_Meredith twisted her hands behind her back. "Oh well then I'll say it the easiest way I know how. Mother, I'm ... I'm pregnant."_

_Ellis just stared at her. "Tell me you're joking. Tell me this is just another bid for attention. I'll call your therapist right now ..."_

_Meredith winced but held up a hand. "I'm not joking, Mom, I'm really not."_

_Ellis pulled off her glasses. Meredith watched her hazel eyes flash dangerously. "How? How the hell did this happen?"_

_"Mom, you're a doctor. I don't have to explain that to you I don't think -"_

_"Don't smart mouth me, Meredith. How did you end up - for lack of a better term - knocked up? Who is the father or do you know?"_

_Meredith's mouth fell open in shock. "Do I know who the father is? Yes, of course. What do you take me for - some kind of cheap whore?"_

_"Moral young women don't get pregnant when they're not married."_

_"So you're calling me a tramp."_

_Ellis sighed. "Meredith, I want to know who the father is and why he's not here then confronting me too."_

_"He's not around anymore. It doesn't matter anyway ... I mean, I'm determined to raise this baby without his help."_

_For the first time since this conversation had begun, Ellis looked genuinely shocked. "Repeat that, Meredith."_

_"You heard me, Mother. I'm keeping the baby," Meredith said as firmly as she could though tears were pooling in her eyes._

_"What about college in the fall? Medical school? Your career? Your life? Do you know how a child can mess up all your plans?"_

_"Like I did, Mother?" Meredith snapped. "I mean, you didn't really want me, did you? I've always been a burden to you."_

_"Don't be so dramatic, Meredith."_

_"It's true. You don't love me or you couldn't sit there saying all these horrible things to me. I am going to love this baby inside of me with everything I have. I'm going to be the kind of mother you never could be!"_

_"Fine," Ellis said and stood up, walking to the back door. "You can play house and raise your child just the way you want to but you won't do it under my roof, or anywhere near me."_

_Meredith nodded. "So you're kicking me out? Just because I for once in my life don't do what you want me to?"_

_"No, Meredith, I am asking you to leave because I won't watch a daughter of mine destroy her life."_

_"I'm not your daughter anymore, Ellis. As of tonight, we're nothing to each other!"_

_Trying to hold her head high, Meredith walked past her mother, never intending to return._

XoXoXo

Meredith went to live with her friend Sadie after that and soon got a job at a local restaurant to support herself and pay for the things her baby was going to need. She thought about looking Mark up a dozen times at least but in the end, she always changed her mind.

She was hugely pregnant and two weeks past due when her daughter decided to make an appearance in the world. She was sitting in Sadie's apartment at the time, watching a "The Addams Family" marathon on a wonky TV set when she finally felt her water break. She called Sadie home early from a date and they went to the hospital together.

Carolyn finally peeped her head into the world after many excruciating hours in labor, screaming her head off and all red in the face, completely bald and also totally beautiful. Sadie cut the umbilical cord and placed the little eight-pound baby girl into Meredith's arms.

_Sadie smiled at Meredith and the baby. "What are you going to call her?"_

_Meredith dabbed at the little girl's stray tears and she peered up at her mother with eyes that were all Mark's. "You know I hadn't thought of it really. I planned everything else as best as I could - or at least I hope so - but I don't have a name ready. I feel when she's ready to be named... she'll let me know."_

They were home three days later when another "The Addams Family" marathon began to play on the TV. As soon as the baby heard Morticia speak, she began to gurgle and coo in that cute baby way of hers.

_"We're not going to call you Morticia, Baby Grey," Meredith said to the baby who kept cooing on. _

_"Okay ... Fine, I'll compromise. We'll call you Carolyn. That's Morticia's 'real name' anyway. How do you like the sound of that?" Meredith asked the baby in her arms. The baby fluttered her perfect, long dark lashes and Meredith nodded. "Okay Carolyn it is."_


	4. Chapter 4

**Part 4**

"Hey, Mom, wake up," Carolyn's voice cut through her subconscious mind and she felt a warm hand on her arm.

Meredith blinked and opened her eyes. "I wasn't sleeping," she said.

Carolyn smiled. "The drool running down your chin tells a whole different story."

Meredith dabbed at her chin discreetly as she could and then smiled as she stretched and sat up. "You have such a smart mouth."

"Learnt from the best," Carolyn said with an irreverent smirk. Right then, Meredith could see she was all her father's daughter. He had that same irreverent attitude; that same zest for life. Or she assumed he still did. After all, it had been twenty-plus years since they made a baby on the beach and he disappeared. So many times she had thought about tracking him down, telling him to step up and before there for their child; but every time she had backed down, telling herself that he wasn't the type to want to be "saddled" with a kid. He had left her waiting on that beach and had never returned so obviously he had had no intention of ever letting things become permanent between them. She had been falling in love with him though and it had hurt that he could just walk away just like that. What she had feared that most - that he would use her and discard her like garbage - had come true.

But thank god - _the Jewish God_, as her best person, Cristina, would say - Carolyn may have had his smile, and a lot of his charming manner, but she had none of his walkaway Joe tendencies.

"Hey, Mom, you're staring," Carolyn said.

"Yeah. Sorry. It's just you look so much like -" Her voice trailed off. "Like your own, wonderful person," she tacked on lamely.

Carolyn looked at her knowingly. "You were going to say I looked like my dad."

"No, I -uh -"

Carolyn smiled. "It's okay. Like, once a year you have that look in your eye where you seem to be comparing me to him. It's about that time again..."

Meredith sniffed haughtily and reached for Carolyn's hand. "I would never, ever compare you the two of you. Because you are everything that he wasn't."

Carolyn climbed onto the bed next to her mom and rested her head on Meredith's tiny shoulder. "Why don't you ever talk about him? Was he super mean or evil or-"

Meredith sighed and shook her head, squeezing Carolyn's arm. "No, baby, he wasn't either of those things. He just had other priorities. I would never try to demonize him to you though. I promise you that."

Carolyn absent-mindedly played with the tips of her new, four-hundred dollar French manicure (Meredith had sprung for the nail job as a pre-graduation present for Carolyn though neither were big on "frilly" accessories; Meredith had just wanted Carolyn to feel special and loved as she was). She ended up completely scratching the paint off one of her nails. Meredith cringed but said nothing. Her nails were going to be messed up soon by the time her first day at Seattle Grace rolled around anyway. Nothing too pretty lasted there very long.

Meredith hugged her daughter close and said, "If you want to talk about -"

"No, I don't. Not really," Carolyn amended. "I just wonder sometimes, you know, what the 'Sperm Donor' is up to now. If he's even alive. If he has other kids or-"

Meredith nodded. "It's natural to wonder. Anyone would. When Thatcher disappeared for so many years ... I wondered too."

"But you knew about him, Mom. You knew his name at least. And eventually you and Aunt Lexie met up and became really close. So ..."

Meredith felt tears well up in her eyes but she held them back. "Okay, baby, ask me anything."

Carolyn cocked her head to the right. "What do you mean?"

"Go ahead and ask me anything you want to know about your father."

Carolyn sighed. "All I want to know is, is his name, Mom. His first name. If could just tell me that ..."

Meredith took a deep breath, gathering all of her courage to say the name she hadn't let pass her lips in so many years. It took every fiber of her DNA to find the strength to finally utter: "His name is Mark."

She quickly ran a hand through her mussed hair. Okay, it had been said. And it hadn't been quite as horrible as she had imagined it to be somehow.

"So anything else you want to know, Caro?" She asked softly.

Carolyn shook her head. "No. Not today. I think it took a lot out of_ both_ of us, hearing that name..."

Meredith smiled. Her daughter was so wise. Every mother believed that about their child but Carolyn Grey _really _was.

"So, Carolyn, you woke me up - yes, I was asleep; I admit it. After all, we were up late last night celebrating ... Anyway, did you have something in mind for us to do today? I don't have to be back to the hospital until Monday so-"

Carolyn smirked and Meredith shook her head. "I know that look. You want to go to SG now, huh?"

"Yeah. I know you have the rest of the weekend off but-" She smiled. "I want to just see it again. Now that I've actually graduated, it will feel even more like home to me."

"Miranda's gunna freak out."

"You can handle her. Chief of Staff or not, she's like five inches shorter than you are."

"But she's a Nazi," Meredith said.

Carolyn laughed. "Oh I know. But maybe if you stand up to her, I can have your back. Two Grey girls against one Nazi. We might have a fighting chance... _Right?"_

Meredith shook her head. "Maybe. Just maybe."

She kicked off her covers and said, "Come on. I have a feeling today will be life-changing for us."

XoXoXo

Chief of Staff Miranda Bailey (Warren) spotted them the second they tried sneaking into the hospital. Even using the cleaning crew's entrance, she had still managed to spot them. A hawk. She was a hawk who missed nothing.

"What is _she_ doing here?" Miranda asked, glancing at Carolyn. "For that matter, what are you doing here, Big Grey? You're not on the schedule until Monday. We're not going to pay you if you come in when you're not even supposed to be here."

Meredith glanced at Carolyn and then turned back to Miranda. "Dr. Bailey, I appreciate that sentiment but my daughter really just wants to get familiar with the place so when she starts here-"

Miranda crossed her arms. "I see that the special favors are starting already. Nepotism at its finest."

Meredith started to reply but Carolyn spoke up first. "Don't be angry, Dr. Bailey. My mother will - I promise you - go out of her way to not favor me. The same way you don't favor your son who has the _chief of surgery spot_ here at Seattle Grace now, right?"

Miranda rolled her eyes, knowing she was caught herself. "Tuck earned that job." She waved her finger in Carolyn's face. "I am going to be watching you, Baby Grey. Really watching you. Even one slip up ..." She slid a finger across her throat pointedly before she then turned and walked away.

Meredith and Carolyn laughed together. "Score one for the Grey girls," Meredith said.

They laughed all the way to the way to the on-call room. "Is that the melodic sound of angels singing or am I imagining things?" Attending Derek Shepherd asked with a decidedly "McDreamy" smile as they moved past him.

"You're imagining things in your old age," Meredith shot over her shoulder. He laughed and Carolyn giggled behind her hand.

"I'm going to win you over one day, Meredith, and then you'll be putty in my hands."

"Sexual harassment is illegal," Meredith returned and then she and Carolyn walked into the room and over to Meredith's locker. Meredith worked at the always stubborn lock as Carolyn stared at her mom.

"Do I have something in my teeth?" Meredith asked.

"No, I just can't believe you keep turning down Derek-"

"That's Dr. Shepherd to you," Meredith said. "Just because he comes to our house practically every week for dinner doesn't mean you don't have to respect him in the workplace."

"Sorry," Carolyn said, only somewhat sincerely. "But 'Dr. Shepherd' is such a catch. Why do you keep turning him down all the time?"

"It's complicated," Meredith said with a sigh as she then proceeded to hit the locker as hard as hard as she could. Finally, the metal door popped open.

"You need to date, Mom. Someone_. Anyone_ at this point will do."

"Well, not one of my colleagues," Meredith replied stubbornly.

Sensing the subject was closed, Carolyn wisely changed topics. "Can we start exploring the hospital now, Mom?"

"Yes. In a second. I just have to check my schedule for Monday. If you are careful you can go ahead of me and I'll meet you in the Pit."

"No. In the _peds unit_," Carolyn said. She smirked. "Thanks for bringing me, Mom. Don't take too long."

"Wild horses cannot keep me away," Meredith teased. She watched Carolyn walk out of the room and she stuffed their things into her locker and slammed the door.

She was turning to check her schedule on the new bulletin board just outside the room when her sister Lexie ran over, fairly trampling Meredith in her frenzy.

"Hey slow down, speedy," Meredith said after she had jumped aside just in time to avoid being knocked down.

"Sorry. It's just - Well, Mer, have you heard the news?" Lexie asked.

"What news?" Meredith asked.

"Is Ceej around?"

_"Carolyn_ stepped out right before you came in," Meredith said. "What's all of this about anyway? Why is your face beet red?"

"Because as soon as I heard the news I came running to find you. Someone mentioned that they saw you and Carolyn come in -"

"Slow down, Lexie. It can't be that big a deal."

"Oh it is, Meredith. Believe me it's ... an epic big deal. At least it is if this is the same guy."

"I'm lost ..."

"Meredith, a guy named Mark is getting a hospital tour right now. He is taking up a plastic surgery post here."

"And that concerns me how?"

"I overheard his name. It's Mark Sloan. Mark _SLOAN."_

Meredith felt her heart stop right then and there.


	5. Chapter 5

_**I got the strongest urge to update this today so I did. It's been a really long, long time since I wrote in this universe so I am really rusty but I hope it's okay. A longer sequel is coming to a monitor near you, very soon!**_

**Part 5**

"_Mark Sloan?"_ Meredith echoed. "No, no way. The Mark Sloan I knew wouldn't have become a doctor. A race-car driver; a male model; a porn star, maybe, but not a doctor."

Lexie splayed her hands. "Well, maybe I'm wrong but he just looks so much like Ceej. And he has that really charming demeanor she has, the same sparkling, mischievous eyes…"

"Lexie, stop rhapsodizing!" Meredith scolded her younger sister.

"I'm not rhapsodizing… not exactly," Lexie said. She nibbled her bottom lip thoughtfully for a moment.

Meredith's heart was racing and she thought she was experiencing all the symptoms of a heart attack. But no, she wouldn't be that lucky to just drop dead here and now so she could avoid the confrontation to come. No, the _possible_ confrontation. After all, Mark Sloan was a pretty common name, right?

Meredith sighed and willed herself to calm down. If just hearing that name could send her into such a tether imagine what seeing him again would be like. But it _wasn't_ him; it couldn't be him.

"Mer, what are you going to do?" Lexie asked. "If it really is _that_ Mark…"

"It can't be. Because if it is… Well, I might as well go crawl into a big hole and –"

Lexie grabbed Meredith by either of her skinny arms and gave her a thorough shaking. "Meredith, stop that!" she said in her most commanding voice. "Don't go to your dark and twisty place. This isn't your fault. He's the one that abandoned you and Carolyn. You have nothing to be sorry for."

"Maybe I do. I took the easy way out."

"The easy way out, Mer? Are you kidding? You raised a kid! All by yourself. You worked your ass off to feed her and clothe her and protect her. You worked multiple jobs so you could put yourself through med school and support her. You saw her through teething, tantrums, messy diapers … And that was before she even turned one. Every moment in her life, you were there for her, Meredith, and he wasn't. Don't forget it."

"You're right," Meredith said. She squared her shoulders. "You're right. I did my best to raise Carolyn right by myself and I think she turned out pretty damn awesome, if you ask me."

"She did. Of course she did. But…"

"But what?"

"Since this guy with the very familiar name is on staff, you've going to have to see him eventually."

"Yeah and once I see him, I can verify that he's not _that _Mark Sloan and it will be the end of the story."

Lexie looked skeptical but nodded. "Okay well here he comes now. Is he the guy?"

Meredith froze in place like the proverbial deer in the headlights. She felt literally unable to move and face the other doctor. "Is he looking this way?" Meredith asked, unwilling and unable to turn around and look for herself.

"Yeah. He kind of seems to be checking us out," Lexie said. She waved to the guy and Meredith cringed. "Sorry, it seemed like the nice thing to do. Shit, Mer, he's coming this way!"

"I'm not ready to see anyone. I think I'm going to be sick," Meredith said and finally found the strength to move. She clapped a hand over her mouth and started running down the hall, zigzagging around patients in wheelchairs and two student nurses pushing a gurney.

She ran for the nearest bathroom and ducked inside. But not before she heard the man speak to Lexie. _"Was it something I said?"_ His voice was smooth and flirtatious. It was him. She didn't have to see his face to know the truth. The Mark Sloan who had knocked her up and The Mark Sloan who had started a job here today were one and the same.

Meredith just made it to the toilet and puked.

XoXoXo

Meredith hid out in the bathroom for what seemed like hours but was likely about five minutes. She shut herself in the stall and paced the small length of the rectangular cell. That's what it felt like – a cell in a prison block. A prison of her own making. How had she thought that one day her lies wouldn't all catch up to her? Sure she hadn't outright lied but an omission was a lie too right?

"I'm screwed," Meredith muttered. She spotted a pair of feet approaching the door of the stall and then the metal handle was being jiggled.

"Mer, are you in there?"

"Cristina!" Meredith cried, releasing a breath she hadn't known she was holding. Her hands went to the lock and she pushed it up. She immediately grabbed Cristina and yanked her into the stall with her. She then re-bolted the door.

Cristina stared at her. "Okay, this is odd," she said.

"Sorry I'm just not ready to face anyone out there."

"So you're cowering in here hiding from your baby daddy, huh?"

Meredith sighed. "Lexie told you?"

"Yeah but she knew you would tell me anyway," Cristina said. "Is it really him – the guy who you gave it up to on the beach like dozens of years ago?"

Meredith nodded. "Yeah it is. At first I didn't want to believe it but-" She broke off for a moment and looked at her feet. There was some vomit on the toe of her left shoe. Great, just great.

"It's him," she finally admitted. "I mean, what is he doing here? It's been almost twenty-six years since he left me standing on that beach… I never expected to see him again. Not that I've actually seen him but I heard his voice and I remembered everything in very vivid detail – Technicolor imagery…"

"Okay I get it," Cristina said. "You're having flashbacks. Do you think he came here to finally get to know Caro? Or maybe he just wants you back."

"I sincerely doubt that. He has no idea Carolyn exists and as for wanting me back.. No way."

"You never know…"

"Cristina!"

"I'm just playing devil's advocate. Do you want me to pants him and then knock him down a flight of stairs?"

"Of course not."

"Damn. I would have enjoyed that – giving him back all the pain that he caused you."

"I'm not in pain. I'm happy," Meredith insisted. "Or I was until he came traipsing in here, upsetting the status quo."

"What are you going to do then?" Cristina asked.

"I don't know," Meredith said. "Any suggestions?"

"Yeah. Two actually."

"Okay. I'm all ears."

"One, don't tell him a damn thing. He deserves nothing for leaving you high and dry the way he did. And two, wash your hair. There's a huge chunk of your breakfast in it and its pretty nasty."

Meredith almost laughed. "Gee thanks," she said. "But you're right. I don't need to tell him anything. He doesn't deserve to know about Carolyn. He can't just waltz in here twenty-plus years later and try to play Daddy to my daughter. He's a sperm donor at best."

"Damn right!" Cristina said. "Now about that hair…"

Meredith nodded. "Alright. I'll wash it and then I'm going collect Carolyn. Maybe you could check on her, make sure she's not-"

"Running into her father?"

"Yes. They will see each other eventually but I'd just really prefer it wasn't today."

XoXoXo

Meredith washed her hair with soap in the dispenser and toweled it dry as best as she could with paper towels from the machine. She then took a deep breath and opened the bathroom door. She looked both ways and seeing the hallway was clear, she made a break for it. She headed downstairs to Pediatrics where she knew she would find her daughter.

Sure enough she found Carolyn in the little nursery holding a little girl with a gaping cleft palate. The girl was Hispanic and couldn't have been more than three or four in age. She had bright gray eyes and she was giving Carolyn her full attention.

"Hey, Mom," Carolyn said when she spotted Meredith standing in the doorway.

"Hi, honey. Did you find a new friend?"

"Yes," Carolyn said with a wider smile. She tapped the little girl's nose. "Rosa, _es mi madre._ Mom, this is Rosa."

"Hola," Meredith said and the little girl giggled. Meredith was happy to hear it. The laughter of a child really was calming and stabilizing. When Carolyn was a little girl, Meredith had never tired of thinking of ways to get her to laugh because she loved hearing the sound so much.

"Rosa here is having surgery so she can smile even brighter," Carolyn said. Rosa looked nervous as Carolyn translated what she had told Meredith. Carolyn then assured he that she would be fine. That she would come out of all of this so happy because she'd have a smile just like everyone else's. She hugged Rosa gently to her side and Meredith's heart warmed.

Meredith smiled herself. Carolyn made her so proud. Even when she was feeling down, Carolyn cheered her up. Things had never been easy but they had been good, happy even. Meredith wouldn't trade any moment she had ever shared with her daughter for anything else in the whole world.

A tear dashed down Meredith's cheek and she wiped it away as quickly as she could but she knew Carolyn had seen it. She looked at her questioningly.

"You're going to be an amazing peds doctor," Meredith said.

"Wait I thought –"

"I know. I want you to be a surgeon but your happiness is really more important to me. And you have a gift. I bet Rosa would agree."

Carolyn's eyes danced with glee. "Thanks, Mom. I have a ways to go but getting your blessing means everything."

Meredith nodded. "Who is doing Rosa's procedure?"

"Me," a masculine voice said from behind her. Meredith froze again even as she felt her stomach start to rumble anew.

She slowly forced herself to turn around and look at him. _Mark,_ she thought. _God, he – he looks almost the same._ And he did. He a little older, sure, with a dash of gray in his curls, but otherwise he was as tan and eat-you-up-with-a-spoon sexy as before. And his eyes. The way he was looking at her. He recognized her too. _Shit._

"Uh okay," was all Meredith could manage to say. She felt dizzy.

Mark stared at her for a moment longer and then turned to look at Carolyn and Rosa. And then Carolyn again. He seemed to be studying her, trying to figure her out. He extended his hand to her. "I'm Dr. Sloan."

Carolyn stared at him, somewhat hypnotized at the sight of him. Meredith wondered what she was thinking and yet she would not ask. At least, not here, not in front of Mark.

"I'm Carolyn Grey." Carolyn shook his hand briefly. "And this is Rosa of course."

"We've met, haven't we, _niña bonita?"_ Mark said and reached out and thumbed her cheek lightly. Rosa giggled anew. Mark could apparently even charm the youngest of females. Meredith, herself though, was determined to remain unmoved and unaffected.

Mark turned around to face Meredith. She felt herself shrinking under his intense gaze. "And you are –"

"Dr. Grey," Meredith muttered.

"Oh so you're Carolyn's sister?"

Meredith flushed. "Um well-"

"She's my mom," Carolyn said with a laugh. "Anyway, I should take Rosa back to her room. Her mom asked me to hold her while she made a brief call but I'm sure she wants her child back now." She looked at Mark. "It was nice to meet you. I know you'll take excellent care of our friend here."

"I will. Thanks for your vote of confidence," Mark said.

Carolyn nodded and tore her gaze from his. She positioned little Rosa on her hip and headed for the door. "C'mon, Mom," Carolyn said.

"Actually, I need to talk to your mom for a moment," Mark said. Meredith felt her heart thud painfully against her chest.

Carolyn looked between them curiously. "Alright. Mom, just come find me when you're ready to go."

Meredith nodded and watched Carolyn go. Her heart was racing as she turned to find Mark standing only a few feet away. "Meredith," he said in a low voice.

She wanted to deny that she was Meredith and just grab her daughter and run for the Canadian border but a crippling case of inertia dogged her steps and made a quick getaway damn near impossible.

"Meredith?" Mark prompted her.

Meredith crossed her arms. "I am surprised you remember me."

"Of course I do."

So many clever retorts percolated in her brain but never reached her tongue. All she could manage was a weak, "Eh."

"Hmm. So that's all I get after all this time?"

Meredith shook her head. "What were you expecting exactly? A party or something?"

"No, but how about the truth?"

Meredith felt gut-punched and she felt bile rising up again. "Look, Mark, I don't know what you're talking about. I don't even want to know. We work at the same hospital for now but let's just keep our distance from each other, okay? No one needs to know we had a fling … such a long time ago."

Meredith turned on her heel and started for the door. She was just over the threshold when Mark called to her again. "Meredith, wait."

She paused. "What?"

"How old is she?"

Meredith's heart thudded painfully against her chest once more. "Who?" She asked, playing dumb, hoping it would work for her somehow.

"Carolyn!" Mark said. "How old is she?" 

Meredith shook her head. "It doesn't matter."

"It does if she's mine." He said it in a low voice but she didn't miss the accusation behind the words.

Meredith's eyes filmed with tears. "It doesn't matter," she said again. People had always told her that she was strong and brave but right now she felt anything but. She didn't want to be having this conversation. She didn't want to have to tell Carolyn and Mark the truth; upset everyone and everything in her life. Mark wasn't entitled to know anything, she remembered Cristina saying just a few minutes ago in the bathroom. He had chosen not to come to the beach that night; this was on him… wasn't it?

"Is she mine?" Mark asked and when Meredith started to edge down the hall, he followed her and positioned himself in front of her, using his strong body as a blockade. "Tell me the truth, Meredith. Is that girl my daughter?"

"It doesn't –" She broke off when she saw the look in Mark's eyes – the warning and the hurt and the anger too.

"It does matter. For the last time, it matters a hell of a lot. Is Carolyn my daughter?"

"Yes," Meredith choked out. She allowed herself one more pitiful tear as Mark clutched his chest like it was aching as much as hers was. She had imagined scenarios over the years where she met Mark and told him about Carolyn but they had all been so different from reality. In most of her fantasies, Mark had said he didn't want a child and he'd walked right away, never to be seen again. But the way Mark was looking at her, she didn't think it would be that easy.

"Ohmigod. Why didn't you –"

"If you're going to stand there and ask me why I didn't tell you about Carolyn, you can rot in hell!" Meredith snapped. "You never showed up on the beach the night we were supposed to exchange phone numbers and addresses. If you had, I would have found a way to tell you a long time ago."

"Would you have? Really?"

"Yes!" Meredith said. "But as it is, it's been over two decades so we can just forget –"

"No, hell no," Mark said. "We're not going to forget this. We're going to tell Carolyn the truth right now."

"No!" Meredith practically howled. She saw Arizona Robbins coming down the hall and flushed as Arizona looked at the two of them curiously, both looking like hell had taken a beating to their spirits. Meredith waved at her and Arizona waved back enthusiastically before ducking into another room.

Meredith dropped her voice an octave. "I raised Carolyn on my own, Mark," she said. "Why go and upset the applecart so many years later? You didn't want to be a father –"

"You can't say that."

"You cut off contact with me."

"Meredith –"

"You stood me up at the beach, Mark. I waited all night and you didn't come – why didn't you come?"

His blue eyes darkened, taking on a stormier look than before. "I had my reasons."

"Yeah I bet," Meredith said sarcastically. "It doesn't matter now."

"You keep saying that but it does."

"I'm not telling Carolyn. Not here anyway, not now."

"Fine. Pick the place, pick the time and date even. But make it soon because I missed a helluva lot of time with my kid already and I don't want to miss any more."

"_Mom?"_ Carolyn's voice echoed down the hall.

Meredith swiped at her teary face and gave Mark a warning look. "I've got to go," she said.

He turned to look at Carolyn, studying her closely under his long, thick eyelashes. He then offered her a smile and turned and walked the opposite way.

Carolyn met Meredith halfway down the hall. "What was that about?" She asked.

"It's nothing," Meredith lied.

"He seems like a charmer," Carolyn said, nudging her mom. "Maybe you and he could-"

"No," Meredith said. "We can't."

They had already tried a relationship and it didn't work out. She would never allow herself to be hurt like that again. Besides, her main worry was how she was going to tell her daughter that the newest hire at Seattle Grace was also her biological father…

_**THE END. For now. The sequel called "Carolyn's Anatomy" will be up ASAP. You probably have a lot of questions and doubts after this story but hopefully they will all be explained and chased away in the next, much longer part! Thanks for being patient for all these years.**_


End file.
